Pee face

So we've been waiting on Wynn to poop all day and finally got it a few minutes ago. Because it had been a while, it was understandably large in size. I was sitting on my bed changing him in front of me. As I was holding his legs up cleaning the poo, I suddenly felt a sprinkle. I looked at him and because of the way I was holding him at an angle, he peed in his own face. I'm talking full-blown pee pee dripping off his face and head. He was halfway asleep up to then but obviously woke himself up. Poor thing... but I got a good chuckle out of it!


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Beer gut

I don't care how much self-confidence you have, there are just some things you should NEVER wear if you're a woman with a gut. A bikini being one of the things. I just saw a chick with a man's beer gut wearing one of those bikinis you buy in the junior department. Good luck getting laid looking like that.


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Laura the Criminal

Wow! I just found out that I have a warrant out for my arrest. So now I get to go downtown after work and stand in line with all the other criminals! GREAT! (can you hear the sarcasm in my voice?) The effing jacked up part about this is I paid my ticket and have the confirmation #, receipt # and even printed documents from the city's website showing that I paid it. Can one of you cops or attorneys look at the paperwork and tell me what some of this stuff means (after my 12/3/09 payment)? I just went upstairs and found some jailbird orange scrubs. I'm thinking of wearing them when I go up there after work...

Is this working?

Testing to see if I can blog from my phone. If this works I'm going to be very happy.

I still haven't learned my lesson about watching what I say in front of Ava. She dropped a "what the hell" in the pool today. At least she didn't do the "sh*t, sh*t, sh*t" song to the ABCs tune. It's hard to keep a straight face when she does that one.


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I know it's been a while...

...but I'm back. I wish I could blog from my phone because I don't always have the time to sit in front of a computer to spill my thoughts. Like this morning- I was sitting in bed drinking my coffee and watching Ruby and Max (with Ava, of course). The thought crossed my mind that if I were Max, I would kick Ruby's ass.